It is one thing to deal with homophobic strangers, but what happens when your family is homophobic? Even though your family should love you regardless of your sexuality, unfortunately that is not always the case. The important thing to know when dealing with this issue is that although you cannot change the way other people feel, you can change the way you react.... Not the golden ticket answer you were expecting, but bear with me here.

If you find that your family is not fond of your beliefs, here are some helpful tips to get you through the tough times:

  • Remember that homophobia is typically a lack of knowledge on the subject. Your relatives may only be repeating stereotypes and opinions that they have been exposed to. This holds especailly true if you come from a conservative or religious family.

  • Educate yourself!! You are probably thinking, "wait, what? But I am not the problem?!"... If you educate yourself on why someone may be homphobic, you allow yourself a deeper understanding on why they are acting the way they are, and can figure out what are the next best steps for you. Maybe they are ashamed of their own sexuality?

  • Remind yourself, that YOU ARE NOT ALONE! The problem is with your homophobic family member, NOT YOU.

  • Unfortunately, we also need to understand that homophobia will not disapear overnight... It's a process :(

  • Throughout this whole process, remember to remain calm and patient. The insults and name calling will hurt, but be the bigger person. Because, at the end of the day, you are an incredible person, regardless of where your sexual preference stands. It will get better.

  • With that being said, you must also stand up for yourself and be honest. Help them understand that you are the same person regardless of your sexual preference and that not all streotypes are true. You also need to unfortately be ready to face any "consequences" of your honesty; i.e restricted friend time, finances, etc. Hopefully this isn't the case!

  • If you are not welcomed at family events, spend time wiht those that are loving and accepting.

Dealing with pure rejection and abuse is a different ball game. Unfortunately, there are some homophobic family members that will never change (the sad truth). Even worse, some of these "loved ones" will physically or emotionally abuse their LGBTQ+ relatives. Many parents will even kick them out of their house. If you find that you are in a situation like this, here are some additional tips:

  • Seek counseling. If you do not have access to counseling (whether that be a physical or financial restriction), check out, You are also ALWAYS free to message us. We are always here for you.

  • If you have extended family members that are open-minded, and accepting, ask if you can stay with them.

  • If you are dealing with any physical abuse, report it to local authorities immediately. That is NOT acceptable, EVER.

We also undertstand that a lot of these tips are a lot easier said than done. If you need any help with any of the listed above (or not listed), please feel free to message us. WE ARE HERE FOR YOU. All the love.